We need to take a step back and take a good look at our attitude.Too often we think of doing something for others only when we have the time or when and if it is convenient to us.If we ;have the right attitude , when someone needs our help we should make time and effort to help.That is sincerity and that is the kind of help which will go a long way.
It makes me wonder if comes the time when we need help will there be anyone there for us ? We read , hear and see for ourselves the old folks who are dumped in Old Folks Home by their off springs with the excuse that they have no time for them as they are always busy .This is an example of people who fail to make an extra effort to do something and use something as a convenient excuse to shirk from their responsibility .We used to make visit to the old folks home and it broke our hearts to the old people sitting down there with lost and blank looks in their eyes .When we asked them how come they were there most would answer their children had no time for them. No time for your parents ? These people obviously think of nothing but themselves and have forgotten who brought them up and did everything for them , made sacrifices for them and went out of their way to see to their well being.They fail to value what their parents had done for them and now that they are old and helpless they just cast them away.Can we rate these kind of people? Can we give them even a little bit of respect ?
We talked to one young man at the kopitiam which we frequent and mum asked him a few personal questions like whom he stayed with and his salary etc.He told us he lived with his parents and he gave all his salary to his father and the father would then give him his pocket money .Mum said he is a rare breed as we seldom come across such young who showed such filial piety to his parents.During my time it was kind of obligatory for us to give part of our salary to our parents.That was mandatory as our parents said we owe it to them as they brought us up.We never argued over this and we always allocated a part of our salary for our parents.Today , parents are less demanding and we leave it to the children entirely.Most parents while they can like to be independent and not trouble the children.It is only when they are old and helpless that perhaps we may need to be looked after but then again ....
We have to ditch the " If I am free " syndrome and really show our willingness to help those in need even if it means making sacrifices and going out of our way.That is putting other people's interest ahead of yours.We need to find the time and willingness to go out of our way for the sake of others.That is the kind of attitude which we ought to have but sadly enough few people have it and that is why we have people who are uncared for or abandoned because the people who matters have no time for them or fail to make time for them.
Monday, December 28, 2015
Monday, December 21, 2015
Year End thoughts
As we near the end of yet another year a few notes for us to ponder:
1.Husband-wife relationship.
In the olden days ( not that old actually , during our time ) husbands and wives followed certain rules.The man was the breadwinner and traditionally the Head of the house.Being so, he was responsible to ensure that the family is well taken care of .He was responsible for all the household expenses and made sure that he made a financial allocation for the wife so that she had enough pocket money for herself.
What she earned ( if she was working ) is irrelevant ,it was the obligation of the man to share what he had with her.This was the marriage commitment .
Today most women are independent , some even earn more and are more capable professionally and intellectually than the husbands.This should not prevent the man from playing his traditional role.Spouses should be supportive of each other and should be pillars of strength for each other >They should under no circumstances be viewed as liabilities in the family unit.If one spouse turns out to be passive, unreliable and unable to contribute to family well being then he is a liability and the family can jolly well do better without him.
2. Communicating.
I have seen different kinds of people in my life time.Some are able to get their thoughts out to others effectively.Communicating is an art and generally most average people are able to talk. Mum is a great talker whilst I will only say what I need to say.that's why perhaps we are so compatible.In communication one must be able to talk sensibly and intelligently.Shouting especially at kids makes you so inferior because people who shout are unable to control themselves and do not realize what a spectacle they make of themselves .What irritates me most is when someone is eating with his head down on his food talking to you without even looking up.To me , the response is very simple when I come across such people ...just refuse to engage with them and ignore such rudeness.These kind of people do not know about body language and what role it plays in effective communication .
3.Proactive .
Some people are simply not aware or sensitive to environment.If we see a child climbing up a chair or playing with a dangerous toy we should be alert to the next step and take the necessary steps to counter it.that's why accidents happen and its basically due to the carelessness of people .Proactive people are always alert and always look one step ahead .If you are not so , obviously you are in a state of oblivion and will not be outstanding in the things you do.Like it or not , life is about planning and being able to look ahead .Sadly I have come across people who lack this .
4. Stubborn.
Some people cant change no matter what .I cant see how such people can progress in life.Granted, we all make mistakes but positive people learn from their mistakes and therein lies the path to self improvement.Some people never learn which makes me to say either they are stubborn ( in a very negative way), insensitive ,or just plain dumb.
With the coming of the end of the year we should reflect on the year gone by , look at our strength and weaknesses and simply make a promise to ourselves that we will strive to be a better person in the new year.
1.Husband-wife relationship.
In the olden days ( not that old actually , during our time ) husbands and wives followed certain rules.The man was the breadwinner and traditionally the Head of the house.Being so, he was responsible to ensure that the family is well taken care of .He was responsible for all the household expenses and made sure that he made a financial allocation for the wife so that she had enough pocket money for herself.
What she earned ( if she was working ) is irrelevant ,it was the obligation of the man to share what he had with her.This was the marriage commitment .
Today most women are independent , some even earn more and are more capable professionally and intellectually than the husbands.This should not prevent the man from playing his traditional role.Spouses should be supportive of each other and should be pillars of strength for each other >They should under no circumstances be viewed as liabilities in the family unit.If one spouse turns out to be passive, unreliable and unable to contribute to family well being then he is a liability and the family can jolly well do better without him.
2. Communicating.
I have seen different kinds of people in my life time.Some are able to get their thoughts out to others effectively.Communicating is an art and generally most average people are able to talk. Mum is a great talker whilst I will only say what I need to say.that's why perhaps we are so compatible.In communication one must be able to talk sensibly and intelligently.Shouting especially at kids makes you so inferior because people who shout are unable to control themselves and do not realize what a spectacle they make of themselves .What irritates me most is when someone is eating with his head down on his food talking to you without even looking up.To me , the response is very simple when I come across such people ...just refuse to engage with them and ignore such rudeness.These kind of people do not know about body language and what role it plays in effective communication .
3.Proactive .
Some people are simply not aware or sensitive to environment.If we see a child climbing up a chair or playing with a dangerous toy we should be alert to the next step and take the necessary steps to counter it.that's why accidents happen and its basically due to the carelessness of people .Proactive people are always alert and always look one step ahead .If you are not so , obviously you are in a state of oblivion and will not be outstanding in the things you do.Like it or not , life is about planning and being able to look ahead .Sadly I have come across people who lack this .
4. Stubborn.
Some people cant change no matter what .I cant see how such people can progress in life.Granted, we all make mistakes but positive people learn from their mistakes and therein lies the path to self improvement.Some people never learn which makes me to say either they are stubborn ( in a very negative way), insensitive ,or just plain dumb.
With the coming of the end of the year we should reflect on the year gone by , look at our strength and weaknesses and simply make a promise to ourselves that we will strive to be a better person in the new year.
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