Life as we grow older

My golfing friends are always proud to introduce me to strangers at the tee box. "Our uncle is in the 7os and still playing with us ".Makes me ponder sometimes when I hear this and realize that hey " I'm a super senior guy" and am still able to do what the younger ones are doing.With this comes the awareness too that I'm indeed very lucky to have come this far in life and be thankful that I have grey hair which my friend say some never live to have. As you grow older you realize that you are given the time and opportunity to do the things which you never had the time to do when you were younger.I see some of the young people live and work nowadays and cannot help but sympathise with them because they miss out on the joys of life and by the time they grow old they may never have had the time to enjoy it.Rushing over meals,thinking of how to make more money ,pondering over work and business strategies all has its price.You lose up on time which can enable you to live a more balanced life.God is reasonable.He gave us Sunday which is for us to relax and spend time doing the things we love to do other than work."No work or work related activities on Sunday" should be a simple maxim for everyone to follow.Time gone cannot ever be recovered. I watch my grandson growing up and this is a joy which should be enjoyed by the parents.At least one day in the week should be devoted to the child and herein lies the bond which will take them through life.Children grow up fast.Its in the infancy and formative years that they need their parents .Once they come to their teens their need for parents is less and by the time they go to college or start working the need is even less as they become more independent.That's why the communication gap come s about. Life is about choices and its up to you to choose how you want to live it. Coming to this age I try to reflect on how I managed to survive till now and come to the conclusion that its important to have a balance in everything you do.From eating to a discipline of no over indulgence life becomes more organized .I have always believed in three meals a day and never over eating even when i come across food which I particularly like and making sure there is a balance between rest ,work and play.Exercise and the right food balance are essential.Supplements like vitamins E,C and multivites have been part of my intake for as long as I can remember. Of course there is no denying the effects of ageing.Memory becomes poor, fatigue sets in more easily,body aches are more and sleep becomes more difficult especially in new surroundings.But on top of all this a positive outlook helps.Gratitude that you have come this far,relatively healthy ( Compared with others who have all kinds of sickness)and the ability to do all things albeit a little less efficient keeps you in positive mode and this helps. What the remaining years bring and what will happen nobody can say.Now live life to the full and do what you have always wanted to do is the maxim.I only hope that in my twilight years I will not be a burden to my children and if possible spare them the pain of seeing us suffer in our remaining journey through life !

Face Value

I remember one of my former Director of Education was very particular about our shoes.He was a fanatic for leather shoes and we saw that his shoes were always shiny and clean>He used to tell us "The key to a man's personality lies in his shoes".To a certain extent face value is important.How do you present yourself and how do others see you are important criteria for your personality measurement. When I was young I had only two sets of clothes for school and one or two after school clothes but as I went on to work I made sure I was smartly dressed for no other reason than to look presentable and to give yourself the self confidence you need to face the world.As a teacher we stood in front of our students and I'm sure they would have looked at us from head to toe.I met an old boy of mine recently and he told me "Sir,you were always smartly dressed and we remember your perfume !!"Presenting the right image is important especially if your work involves customer service and meeting people.People are always critical and judgemental and like to form opinions about you when they meet you.Looking at the clothes you wear ,your shoes,your hair ,down to your nails and the way you match your clothes tend to make them form opinion about you. trying to be simple to the extent that you look like a hobo is overdoing it a bit to say the least>You may be successful but if you dont present an image expected of you then it may seem that you lose out. The Emperors of China take a lot of trouble to be presentable and they also insisted that all their top ranking officials be presentable too so that the people as well as visitors are awed by their mere presence.When you see someone wearing JL tee shirts ,or Dunhill shirts with Bally belts and Boss pants you cant help but feel that this guy got some class.Of course CLASS does not just come with the clothes you wear,it comes together with the way you carry yourself,your etiquette ,manners and general behaviour.But there is no doubt that looking good helps you to do a lot of things.That is why some companies insist that their top men or women follow a certain dress code when they go out or uniforms on certain days of the week. One has be sensitive about one's status and present oneself accordingly.If you are for example holding a senior post in an organisation you should present yourself becoming of the status of your position and also that of your company. Asians generally look at things on the surface .That is why our leaders and top officials make it a point to be presentable all the time though they may be rotten inside.

Honour thy father and mother

Today Chinese all over the world converge on to the cemeteries and pay homage to their forefathers .They do so in so many forms ,some simple with just a few joss sticks and some simple offerings in the form of fruits and paper money, others lavishly with roast pigs ,roast chicken and paper houses and cars and etc.Today the amount and types of such things in the market is mind boggling .This is to make the living happy that they can offer all these things to the departed. The symbols aside Ching Ming is a day set aside for the Chinese to pay their respects to the dearly departed and also a chance for family members to gather together in family unity brought together by a common bond.It is heartening to see the living descendants gather at the grave yard and its a kind of get together amongst family members to remember their parents, grandparents.The Chinese are very sensible people ,although Ching Ming falls on the 4th April this year they can do the pilgrimage to the graves one week before and one week after the actual date.This is to suit the schedule of the busy living ones and it gives all family members a chance to fix a date convenient to everyone. According to Chinese custom only the male descendants are obliged to do Ching Ming,the females are not.But if they so decide they have to do it for the male's side>it does not really makes sense>i have 4 daughters and does it mean that when I go they need not come to my grave but when their father in law dies they have to? To me there should be no such division ,as long as you feel that you want to remember the dead you do so.I have always been to my mother and father in laws graves without fail every year and I do that because I knew them and they were good to me so what's the rubbish about sons in law not having to do it for their in laws.My wife and I have this mutual respect for each other's parents.She follows me to may parents graves and I do the same when she goes to her parent'.So what is the big deal? Why is it that the male cannot go to the girl's side and why the female must follow the husband's? It is sad when you go to a graveyard during this place and see some graves which are badly neglected and obviously unattended for many a year and we wonder who is the poor soul who lies forgotten by his descendants. It is good to remember our ancestors for they gave us life and brought us to this world for better or for worse.If a man cannot remember his roots and remember his forefathers ,to me he has no soul and should take a good look at himself !