Chasing a dream

During my school days me and my best friend used to stand by the roadside and dreamed of the day when we could drive a convertible ( very much an "in" thing those days ) with hood open , pipe in hand and sun glasses with everyone looking at us.It has been decades since then and I have never owned a convertible but today that dream has vanished and there is not much to dream of . having gone through the various stages of life I think I am able to look back with a certain amount of pride and regrets.Pride in the sense that when I started life's journey I had nothing except perhaps a burning desire to make it in life and make my parents proud of me.Looking back today , materially I have perhaps got the things I dreamed of , a good wife, children, grand children and in laws.We have a little house , nothing lavish but its what we can call home.We dont owe any money and are quite comfortable.At this age our needs are very simple, a happy family and above all peace of mind.Many of my friends ask me " How can you , a government servant , put four children through university ?". I often wonder myself and perhaps we can rate this as our biggest achievement in life ..to be able to give each and everyone of our children one of the most important things in life..education.We have not been wrong in focusing on this and working hard to achieve this goal.looking at our children today we know we made the right decision. We have indeed come a long way in life and today there is little of the young man's dream left to chase except to stand aside and watch the children manage their lives and perhaps wish that they can achieve their dreams whatever they may be.To me a simple meal, my golf and spending time with the family are precious enough .We can take a step back and reflect of what we had gone through and muse on the things we did not realize.I wish that my parents can be around today so that they can enjoy a bit of what life can offer.I feel sad that my parents never had the chance to travel or fly in a plane. I think the furthest they went was by bus or by train. They did not have the chance to do so many things which we take for granted today.Yet never did I hear them complain , their whole life was centered on us the children and who can imagine the sacrifices they had to make for us , the children.Yes... I feel sad that we are unable to reward them or take care of them as they deserved, So life has its ups and downs and going through the cycle adds to one's experiences and surely makes one a better person.

A matter of pride

I cannot understand why some people keep on doing the same thing , things which displease others and despite being told never make an effort to improve. Pride ? Stubborn ? Inconsiderate ? or just dumb ? The test of the person's caliber is in how he manages his time and himself.Today's culture and practices are a far cry of that of the olden days>Dinner for example was a family affair and everybody has to be at the dining table when the family head sits down.Of course in today's lifestyle it may be difficult but maybe a bit of management and effort could make this happen.If its inevitable that you be late then you should realize that you are late and finish your food as quickly as possible.You should realize that the dishes need washing and cleaning and is it fair that you keep the home maker busy till late night ? This is where the consideration factor comes in and thinking more of others than yourself goes a long way. We should every now and then take a step back and take a good hard look at ourselves .What sort of a person am I ? Do I get into everybody's hair and if I do can I improve ?What are my strengths and weaknesses ? It is through this continuous self evaluation that we can improve. No one is perfect but there is a difference between the one who constantly strives for improvement and the dead wood who is oblivious to anything and makes no effort to improve at all.For example when I am driving and somebody tells me to slow down I would react and do so because of the simple fact that we are sensitive to others.Pride can make me ignore such advice, Inconsideration and the " cant be bothered attitude can also be reasons but the most annoying one is STUPIDITY which forms a mental block between what you should do and what you actually do > Too often we are so wrapped up in a certain habit that we simply refuse to make an effort to improve .If I am wasting time doing something and if I am being told about it the thing should at least be considered and if reasonably and effort should be made to improve.There are people who keep doing the same unacceptable thing year in and year out and you cant expect people like this to go far in life as they would never change .How can we define those people who would never make an effort to change even a little of their bad habits ? I have seen them being told off, their weakness pointed out and yet there is no change >How can be define such people ? As teachers we had come across students whom many gave up at hopeless but with encouragement, and care they showed improvement and were able to lift up their heads .It beats me how come there are people who do not seem to have the capacity to improve or just dont want to put in any effort to do so but as the saying goes " It takes all kinds of people ", the question is what kind of people do you want to be known as ? ...the go getter or the deadwood ?

The best things in life

Of late I acquired a knack for a simple new habit.In the morning with a cup of my morning coffee beside me I would pull a chair and sit at the porch enjoying the cool morning air.It is a time for relaxation and reflection and its so refreshing that you cant imagine it unless you try it.Its great what a few minutes of peace and quiet can do and the good thing is that you clear a lot of things mentally during those few minutes. It is good for the body and soul and it absolutely costs you nothing. We all need our breaks but sometimes we need to take a look at the way we take our breaks. Most people will associate a break with a get away to a distant country not realizing that after that they will feel more tired.When you travel you upset your whole rhythm eating different food , sleeping on strange beds and basically pushing yourself to the limits as one would not want to waste any time or opportunity when abroad.The end result is you need a holiday to recover from your holiday. Sitting quietly by yourself enjoying your cup of coffee and just letting your mind wander is something which many have not learned to appreciate>Feeling the cool morning breeze and sometimes watching the sun come out does wonders and gives you the breather to look forward to the day's activities.The body is relaxed and so is the mind and that is the time of the day when we can perhaps view things in proper perspective. I love this so much that I do the same thing after dinner but this time without the coffee.Again you enjoy the serenity of the night and you run through the day's events and whether you could have done things differently. This is therapy for the soul. A lot of things run through the head and the best part is you can come up with some fruitful thinking and it is also the time to wind down before bedtime. We are so busy with our daily routine that we forget to give ourselves these moments of peace and quiet which actually gives you so much and rest .No need to go for holidays to get this as its right there in front of you. You just to just make a little pause and enjoy this, one of the best things in life and you get it FREE !

A chance encounter

This week I was in Pj for lunch when lo and behold stood an old friend whom I have not seen since Varsity days in the 60s .We recognized each other immediately .YOu cant forget the face of a guy whom you saw everyday be it decades ago. GC was quite a character as we wanted to portray himself as an eccentric.His dressing and mannerism were simply out of the world.I remember we were studying in the library at night ( you know what libraries are like ) when suddenly he jumped up and let off a big scream.Needless to say everyone was startled and when questioned he just said a big cockroach bit my leg.It was of course not true but he got such a big kick out of it. We were the best of buddies sharing a lot of common interests despite his odd behavior.He came from a well off family whilst I was a struggling student.He would not hesitate to pay for our char koay teow or drinks and I would ride with him on my ramshackle Honda Cup which took us to as far as KL .There was a club called the Chinese Club in Bukit Bintang where there were billiards tables and we used to go there on weekends for a game or two. We spent lots of time together , studying , playing and planning our future>I kept telling him " You have to put up a more presentable image as society will never accept you as you are " He could not accept this saying " I am what I am ".A very intelligent guy I knew he would be headed for better things. he had a crisis in the Varsity ....he fell in love with one of my classmates , a short chubby little girl from Penang >She however treated him like a brother as she told me he was too weird for her,He went through a rough patch with her and even today he still talks of her.He aws two years my junior and when I went on to Telun Intan after studies we lost touch as we lived in a world of letters and no i phone or i pad.I lost touch with him and it was only in the 80s that we bumped into each other.He was one of the top managers of Nestle and I could not believe my eyes when I saw him with shirt and tie and a complete corporate man.I was happy that my good friend made it in life and it strikes me that we are survivors , having gone through the mill and making it in life. He is now retired and is quite contented with what he has achieved and I am sure we will meet up again to relive the good old days when we had nothing except a dream that we will be able to make it one day and the trials and learning experiences which we went through have served to make us strong and resilient to this day.Welcome back to my life GC .I'm sure we will still have some moments to share.

They dont make them like they used to....

I was told a young man driving outstation had to make pit stops as he was sleepy and tired.At my age I can still drive to Ipoh without any stop and have full concentration.Why the difference ? We were born in the 40s and 50s and we grew up to be tough and resilient.I remember when we were young we ate whatever came our way and eating the two main meals in the house.Biting raw sugar cane , chewing on raw sour mangoes with salt in our hands were quite normal .We enjoyed it and water was always from the taps .Those days I believe water was clean unlike today , many decades ahead.Seems here that we are going backwards. Our recreation were all outdoor , playing in the rain , swimming in the river running here and there.We had no TV , i pad or phone .There was no need for all this as if we wanted to see a friend we would just go to the house and shout his name at the top of our voices.We ate what was on the table , no dining out for breakfast or lunch or dinner.Funny we did not miss what we have now because those days all these types of food were simply not available. Today , holiday means travel and travel overseas.For us holidays meant no school , no homework and plenty of play.Tuition was unheard of and we depended on what the teachers in school taught us. Then teachers were teachers and they really imparted knowledge to us and we all held them in awe and respect.If we were to go out at night and happened to see a teacher we would hide and tried not being seen.If not the teacher would grill us the next day. We ran a lot and played all types of games. there were no snacks in between and no coke or 100 plus to quench the thirst .Just go to the nearest tap and drink to your heart's content,.Yes we were brought up the hard way and that is why you find so many successful people from our generation because as someone puts it we have what it takes !

Health

A month of doctor's dressing , painful scraping of the knee finally came to an end ...my troublesome knee wound is healed and I'm back to normal insofar as my leg is concerned.It was quite a hassle going to the clinic everyday ( and finding the right time to do it )and letting the doctor torture me. Trouble too in terms of showering and not wetting that part of the leg until I discovered a water proof kind of plaster which helped solve that problem . Going in and out of the clinic and now has made me aware of how we should never take health for granted and its only when you lose a part of it that you begin to regret and mutter to yourself " I should have been more careful ! or why didn't I do that ?".As you grow older you look around you and see that there are many people in less fortunate straits...some diagnosed with the big C and passing away , some facing it and having to go through painful treatment and some no longer around.I have recently lost quite a few friends and this is enough to make me realize what a blessing it is that we are ok and not have to have our children worry about us. Still health is not something which we should take for granted and which we have to nurture and look after. Moderation in what we eat and what we do to our bodies will help maintain good health and with good health a lot of worries and stress are avoided.When my knee wound took a long time to heal there was the worry that my sugar level and age might cause something serious like amputation and there were many sleepless nights because of this .Thankfully it turned out alright. Never atke health for granted and dont wait until you are about to lose it to value it.